by Giselle Bello

You and your new boyfriend decide to go on your first vacation together. You are super excited about this, but then the worries start to creep up…where will you travel to? And do what? And sharing a bathroom for a week?! Never fear, here are some pointers to ensure smooth sailing on your first getaway.

Planning

For your first vacation, make sure you go somewhere that mutually interests both of you. Maybe you’re both into skiing, or nature, or culture. Find something you both are excited about, and points if it’s somewhere new for you both so you can experience it for the first time together.

Keep travel time to a minimum and find a destination that doesn’t include multiple layovers or 20 hour flights. It’s a bit too much pressure for new couples.

Similarly, try and avoid high maintenance or ‘extreme’ destinations. You won’t have a clue what to expect. The last thing you want is for funky cuisine to leave one of you in the bathroom half the time, or extreme weather to make a mess of your skin and hair. 

Once you have the destination picked, you can even go ahead and book tickets to the shows or events you want to see before you travel. This keeps things easy for when you arrive, as you already have plans to look forward to.

Are you comfortable around him?

Remember that SATC episode where Miranda is vacationing with a new bf and uses the hotel bathroom lobby because she doesn’t want to go when he is in the room? Sharing space (particularly bathrooms) will definitely test your comfort level with each other, so make sure you are comfortable enough around him before you check in somewhere for the week.

Group trips or one on one?

Traveling with a group can be really fun, but make sure everyone is on the same page before heading out. Otherwise you will have awkward or tense moments when you want to have a fancy champagne and caviar evening, while your boyfriend’s bro just wants to head to the nearest pub. One on one trips also give you more control over the itinerary.

Packing and Pampering

Keep your traveling hassle free, and do not overpack! Granted, you do not want to wear the same outfit in every single picture. But pack efficiently, bringing a few key and versatile pieces.

Finally, get all your lady pampering done before flying off. Nails, root touch ups, bikini lines, etc. You will be ready for action right when you land! 

Photo Credit: photostock

Read More Comments (0)

Is it ever okay to have sex on a first date? 

If you had asked me 20, or even 10 years ago, I probably would have said something along the lines of, “Not if you want it to go anywhere other than the bedroom.” 

The Rules

I’ve never considered myself a, “Rules Girl,” although the first book, “The Rules: Time-tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right,” DID come out the year I graduated from high school and I’ve known plenty of women who swear they met their husbands because of it.

No, far from following the book’s 30 plus dating and relationship rules , (which already seemed a bit outdated and antifeminist to me, even for 1995), I’ve always danced to the beat of a slightly different drummer when it comes to dating and sex. In fact, I may have been a girl born well ahead of my time… a Millennial born in a Generation X world. 

The Beginning of the End

Much to my mother’s horror and confusion, I discovered the power of the World Wide Web as a teenager in the early 1990s. I quickly discovered that meeting both boys my own age and much older men online was easy and extremely enlightening. In fact, I owe my personal sexual awakening in large part, to the internet.

Hookup Culture

Of course today’s Gen Y-ers and Millennials are no strangers to dating sites, video chat, sexting, and other invasions of tech into our dating and sex lives. In fact, I have many 20-something friends who have never been on a traditional date. Instead, they message back-and-forth with their crushes on dating sites and Facebook. They text. They make tentative plans to meet-up with that potentially special someone, (or a group of someones), to hangout. If things go well, they hookup and continue hooking up. Maybe they’re exclusive. Maybe not. Dinner and a movie never enter into the courtship equation.

So what about sex on a first date?

If traditional “dates” are no longer a part of the dating process for many people, the question of whether or not it’s “okay” to have sex on a first date becomes irrelevant. 

Regardless of what other people are (or aren’t) doing and the current trends of hookup culture, the most important thing to consider is what YOU want to do and how YOU feel about it. If you DO go for it, enjoy yourself and use protection!

Read More Comments (1)

I know you may chuckle when you think of your relationship or relationships that you had during your college years. Remember meeting in the quad when both of you had a two hour break. You went to go catch a bite to eat in the cafeteria: a healthy salad for you and a slice of pizza or two for him.

 

Now you’re married to someone else and you find yourself longing for those years of college freedom, late night conversations on AOL instant messenger, and party hopping with your honey. Back then both of you were so carefree and loose.

But all isn’t lost, you can still have the college spontaneity that you had back in college. You and your spouse don’t have to get old too fast. Do some of those crazy activities that you did when you were younger. 

For instance, you are never too old to go out and party. You and your spouse can go out, listen to live music, get your boogey on… But of course, this time you have to be a bit more responsible. You can’t get completely drunk like you once did, unless you’re in the comfort of your own home… well that’s different. 

You can also go on a spontaneous road trip. Remember taking those random road trips with friends and significant others? You all can still hit the road with nowhere in mind, riding off into the sunset. Kudos if the road trip involves a motorcycle. 

All the fun isn’t gone as you grow older and settle into your daily routines. Sometimes life (and your relationship) calls for an escape from the everyday grind. With that being said, I hope that 2013 will be a year of wealth and happiness for you, in both business and relationships.

Happy New Year! Get out there and be spontaneous! 

Read More Comments (0)

Hot holiday plans? Let’s take a moment to talk about the babysitter. No, I’m not talking about the teenage girl who sacrifices her holidays and weekends to sit around with young kids to earn extra cash for her new car. I’m talking about the lady “babysitters” who have to babysit their boyfriends and husbands when their boos are not able to care for themselves.

Nobody wants to be the babysitter during the holidays. You couldn’t pay me enough to do it! Taking care of your drunken significant other who can’t hold their alcohol? Who wants that job? Nobody! Ironically, you may yourself want to be that person who has to be taken care of by your boo. Don’t worry, I too enjoy being taken care of from time to time, but I would rather be taken care of in other ways…

Maybe I’m wrong to pity the babysitters of drunk (and otherwise inebriated) partiers. I’ve been on both sides of the situation, and I honestly haven’t enjoyed either experience. 

Face it, babysitting your significant other sucks and it’ll always suck. Nothing positive comes from the situation besides wondering why he or she acts the way they do when they’re drunk. Also, you wonder if they meant every word they said when they were drunkenly rambling on about how they really feel about you. 

And if you were the drink one, overcoming the awkwardness and shame of having to explain your drunken actions to your boyfriend, husband, (or even your girlfriends), can be challenging. When you are finished apologizing and trying to talk your way out of the horrible things you did and said, hopefully your loved ones will forgive you.

If you find yourself on either end of the drunk babysitter spectrum this holiday season, try not to let it come between you and your boo. One (or two… or three…) nights of rowdy drunken behavior pale in comparison to your love for one another (hopefully).

Read More Comments (0)