When Co-Parents Collide
21-May-2012
Tags:
Co-parenting , Communication Tips , Parenting
Today, less couples are staying together for the kids. Studies show that it’s actually better for the kids if an unhappy couple call it quits rather than subjecting their children to the constant fighting and uncertainty.
Less couples are actually getting married in the first place as well, but after they split, more and more parents are giving co-parenting and honest shot. Unfortunately, it can be difficult for separated parents to stay on the same page. It’s often even harder for them to communicate important information about their children with one another.
Like it or not, you need to figure out a way to communicate effectively with your child’s other parent.
Tips for Co-Parenting Communication
Use A Daily Planner
Designate one daily planner for your child (or each child if you have more than one), and fill it with updates about special events (dance recitals, sporting events, dates, vacations, etc) as well as important information about school projects and events… along with anything else that seems important about your little one. Then, when you hand off your child to their other parent, hand them the daily planner as well, so that they can add anything they need to and read-up on the items you’ve added.
Drawbacks – if something comes up while your child is with their other parent, it can be difficult to remember to add it to the planner later. If you and your ex are internet savvy, you may want to consider an online calendar (like Google), which you can both update at any time.
Have A Drop-off Luncheon
Even if you aren’t otherwise on speaking terms with your ex, you can’t deny how important it is that the two of you discuss your children. Rather than the quick drop-off and evil glares the two of you generally exchange, make it a point to sit down together and share a meal at least once a week. This allows you time to talk about not only what event events and plans your child has coming up but also more personal things like emotional issues your child is going through or how you both want to handle discipline.
A combination of the two – a daily planner and a daily drop-off date, often works wonders for co-parents. Just remember – the most important thing in the world is the health and happiness of your child.