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  • Zombie Apocalypse Starts In Miami With Naked Cannibal

    29-May-2012
    Tags: naked Man Eats Other Man's Face , Zombie Apocalypse , naked cannibal , Miami , Lsd Overdose

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    zombie apocalypse 
     
    A naked man was found chewing on another man’s face in Miami over the long holiday weekend. The naked man refused to stop, even when ordered to do so by Miami Police. A witness says the naked cannibal growled at police and then, "The guy just kept eating the other guy away, like, ripping his skin."

    A Miami police officer shot the naked cannibal, but the attacker continue to chew on the victim’s face. The police officer then shot again and killed the attacker. The victim was rushed to the hospital, with 75% of his face having been eaten off.

    Follow-up reports from the police department state that they suspect the naked cannibal was high on a new form of LSD which causes users to frequently strip their clothes off due to excessively high body temperatures. The LSD also causes delusions and may have been the cause of this bizarre attack.

    A very sad story indeed. The nature of the attack has folks all around the world speculating about the “real” cause of this cannibalistic violence. Was it really LSD or perhaps the start of the zombie apocalypse? In the event that the zombie apocalypse is upon us, the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) has published a guide titled, “Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse.” The post was initially done as a bit of a joke from the CDC, although it does include actual emergency preparedness information.

    The guide is available on their website and includes information such as what to put in your emergency kit. It turns out a zombie apocalypse emergency kit is much like others and includes:
     
    • Water (1 gallon per person per day)
    • Food (stock up on non-perishable items that you eat regularly)
    • Medications (this includes prescription and non-prescription meds)
    • Tools and Supplies (utility knife, duct tape, battery powered radio, etc.)
    • Sanitation and Hygiene (household bleach, soap, towels, etc.)
    • Clothing and Bedding (a change of clothes for each family member and blankets)
    • Important documents (copies of your driver’s license, passport, and birth certificate to name a few)
    • First Aid supplies (although you’re a goner if a zombie bites you, you can use these supplies to treat basic cuts and lacerations that you might get during a tornado or hurricane)

    Hopefully the victim in this sad naked cannibal attack recovers fully. In the meantime, is your zombie apocalypse survival kit ready?


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